There are a lot of feelings built up inside me that I am working on. Anger, rage, resentment, grief, rejection, envy and sadness. The source of these feelings is my parents addiction, which I grew up basing my life around. I do all the healthy recommended strategies for dealing with these feelings. Up until a […]
The pain and anguish of healing childhood trauma; temporary. This too shall pass. The nightmares, the anxiety, the feeling unsafe, temporary. This too shall pass. The resentment, anger, envy and feelings of betrayal; all temporary. This too shall pass.
I don’t want to be bitter. I don’t want to be resentful. I don’t want to be angry. Ever since I began my healing process from trauma, I have felt all of these feelings I don’t want to feel. Some say it is grief for a safe childhood that I never had. I wonder how […]
Harmony is one of my goals. To live in harmony, means to live consistently and in peace. At the moment, I have days with no PTSD symptoms and days with severe flashbacks, irritability, self doubt and tears. My goal is for consistency. I’m aware that there are good days and bad days in everybody’s life, […]
Some people experience things that change them radically. Miracle stories, where they see a hypnotist and they are forever changed. Others report they have a huge epiphany and never experience anxiety again. I know these stories are few and far between and there are many explanations for miracles. I wish I could experience some major […]
Climbing upwards, trying to achieve healing. Making goals, trying to make progress. Two steps forward and one backwards. As I continue climbing, some days feel like I’m about to fall, some days feel like I’m making great lengths of progress. The results aren’t always tangible, but still I continue to climb. Until I can look […]
I’m cranky. I don’t want to be. I wish I could let it go. Is this trauma? Making me permanently irritable, cranky, mad, angry? It’s not as though I like it. It’s not as though I enjoy feeling like this. The truth is when I’m going about my day; memories from the past pop into […]