But I Don’t Know How…

Growing up in a dysfunctional family is hard. Especially when somehow you grow up into a normal functional human, despite your background. People have high expectations of you. I feel more comfortable around dysfunctional people with addiction and violence issues than I do around healthy functional people. For instance I feel really uncomfortable and anxious […]

Letters of Forgiveness: To Myself

Dear me, Oh my goodness, you have fucked up so many times. But I’ve decided to forgive you. I know that no one is perfect. I know that you are learning. I know that you always do your best with the resources that you have at the time. I forgive you. I forgive you for […]

Letters of Forgiveness: To My Flatmate at University

To my Flatmate at University, When you first moved in I felt sorry for you. The other 4 of us were all good friends, and when we had a spare room and advertised it, you ended up moving in. I remember making a real effort to get to know you, seeing as you were “the […]

Re-victimisation

Re-victimisation, unfortunately, has consistent evidence. Up to 75% of adults that  experienced abuse as a child, also reported experiencing abuse as an adult. When I first entered therapy, I felt like I “attracted” people who were abusive, I described a series of thorny experiences. A therapist explained to me the concept of re-victimization and that […]

Breakthrough

I finally feel like I’ve had a bit of a breakthrough. After the last few weeks of feeling low, in energy, in mood and in general well-being, I woke up this morning feeling different, with a crescendo of energy and zest for life. The motivation I’ve been lacking lately, had finally evaporated off (a little […]

Healing: A Marathon Not a Sprint

When I fist began this journey of healing from my trauma, I was 24 years old. I wound up in a therapist’s office explaining how both of my parents were alcoholics, I was a codependent to them, I had trauma from my childhood and I expected to be in therapy for three months while I […]