I used to tell myself I had a good childhood. My parents had money, I grew up in an upper class neighbourhood, I went to a nice school and was taken on outings and expensive holidays.
I used to feel guilty for feeling resentful of my parents for the childhood I was given. After all, no one has the perfect parents and it’s easy when you grow up upper middle class to compare yourself to children who ended up homeless or in state care. The valuable thing I have learnt however, is that just because I had well to do parents, it doesn’t mean they weren’t abusive.
My parents were, and still are, alcoholics. I was exposed to their addiction. My life was chaotic growing up, I was exposed to domestic violence. I was on the receiving end of drunken violent outbursts that were verbal and physical. I was neglected when they were passed out on the floor for hours.
I’m now owning my story, I’m no longer going to feel ashamed for speaking about the sub standard care I received growing up just because someone else probably had it worse. The parenting they gave me was not good enough. I was not safe and growing up.
There’s nothing I can do about the past, but I’ve been told I need to own my story and acknowledge the past, in order to move forward into the future. Im breaking the cycle and it atarts with me!